Tuesday, October 25, 2016

For those who wait

Isaiah 64:4

From of old no one has heard
or perceived by the ear,

no eye has seen a God besides you,

who acts for those who wait for him.


One of the CDs that we listen to when we're out and about in Big Blue is simply a year's worth of our church's elementary grade Sunday School memory verses set to music. It's great for the kids, yes, but it's also good for me to be hearing those things in an easy to remember fashion. I also find that it's one way that God uses to talk to me - when I surround myself with his words, the right ones jump out at the appropriate time.

We have a God who acts. One who does stuff. That makes life exciting. ;) Because if God is busy doing then I can be watching for him. He's not silent, or distant, but present and observable.

What really got me about this, though, was who he acts for - for those who wait for him. It's a theme I see repeated over and over throughout the Bible. A life lived by faith is one that requires patience, waiting. Because if we already had what we needed, or knew just how it was going to work out, we wouldn't need Him to act, would we? (Romans 8 - But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.)

There are many places in our life right now where we're waiting for God to act. I've realized that I prefer to live my life in a place where it won't be okay if He's not there, because I want to live in a place where I get to see his hand touching things all around me! 

With this school year Matt and I have figured out a way to do something we've wanted to do for years, but could never work out logistically. We've wanted to have a regular time to share with and teach our children (and hopefully learn from them as well!) about this active God we love so much. Mealtimes *seem* like a good idea because everyone's there, but anyone who's ever witnessed a mealtime at our house knows it's not really time to do much of anything important or requiring concentration on anything other than the logistics of the task at hand. Bedtime, which is a nearly two-hour long marathon of diapers and toothbrushes and various different stories being read aloud is a similarly bad time in our household. Enter "2:30 Time"!!! Our ah-ha! came when we realized that the middle of the afternoon is a perfect time to gather most of us together. The littlest ones are napping, but the little boys are off the bus by that time, the big kids aren't off with friends yet, and Daddy usually needs a break to wake him up from the monotony of sitting at his desk.

Our agenda is pretty simple - one of us shares something we've read recently in the Bible - usually it's a verse or part of a chapter from whatever we were reading the night before. Sometimes we sing a song; sometimes we have a snack. ;) (The snack is an important part!) I shared the verse from the beginning of this post during 2:30 Time last week, and we talked with the kids about all of the things we're waiting on. We need a mattress for B. We need supplies (and time!) to finish the basement bedroom. We need things yet unknown for when the girls come home, both material things like a way to safely transport T, and immaterial things, like help at home during the first period of time when T will hopefully be inpatient at Gillette to get her stabilized and to get as much initial testing out of the way as we can. How exciting to be able to share with the kids what we're waiting for, asking them to be watching with us for how God is going to act.

Earlier this week our pastor emailed us because he, a week at a time, devotes himself to praying for each family in his congregation, and this was our week, so he wanted to know if there were specific things we wanted him to be praying for. Matt laughed, because last time he asked us was right when we were in the process of deciding if we were or were not supposed to pursue adopting T. ;) Matt wrote back, laying out some general things, some specific things, and some intentionally oblique things. 

One of the specifics was related to some of my concerns about caring for T during the week we are in Sofia for the pick up trip. We plan to arrange ahead of time to have her transported directly to the children's hospital upon landing in the States so any testing that needs to be done, or any medical care she may need will be ready for her. But I need somehow to keep her alive for the week in between picking her up and getting her here! I'm not particularly concerned about the day to day process of feeding with an n-g tube, but I AM a little daunted by learning how to do it through a translator in a foreign country where I don't get a few tries with someone supervising - I've got to learn it, and then DO it, and do it correctly, right from the get-go.

Within an hour of Matt emailing our pastor back with this specific request, another mom I'm connected with via a private Facebook group (of families who've adopted from Krassi's orphanage) contacted me. She and her husband are also adopting again from the same orphanage, and are at almost the same point in the process as we are - maybe a few weeks ahead at most. She is a nurse!!! and she said she'd be willing to push off their girls' pick up trip a week or two so it would line up with our pick up trip so we would have an English speaking nurse staying in the same hotel as we are for that week in Sofia!

Waiting doesn't mean the answer will be long in coming. It might be. It doesn't have to be. Waiting simply means putting our trust in the God who acts without knowing when or how He is going to act, but knowing that He WILL act for those who wait for him, and then getting to sit back and watch it all unfold.

Monday, October 17, 2016

This is part of why it works

[Mom, this is for you!]
The tree outside our dining room window, glowing in the sun last night against the cloudy sky.

Our life with seven, soon to be nine, children, is always very busy, often chaotic, but never boring. I can't tell you how many times I've had someone ask me how I do it, and there are plenty of days when I can't seem to get anything done, or plans really don't go (at all!) the way I'd expected because of the many unforeseen circumstances that can arise when you're juggling ten people, but there are also days like today to balance it out.

 The day was warm, despite being mid October.
 Reuben was home from school working off the tail end of a cold.


 And sometimes you just have to take advantage of the right time and have Dad put his work on hold for the rest of the hour and all go outside and play in the leaves for a while before lunch.

 Grandma thought we were "raking." It only looked like we were raking (well, because we were all holding rakes and using them to make big piles of leaves, so I guess it was understandable!)
We were all out there just to play. ;) Throwing, running, giggling - the only thing missing from a perfect morning was that Krassimir was NOT too sick to be at school, so he wasn't with us, and our B and T aren't here yet to enjoy the excitement with us.

Our life may be encumbered in many ways, many things are tremendously more difficult for our family than for a smaller family, or a family with "normal" children, but we also have flexibility and freedoms that we try to take advantage of when the occasion arises! And life is good.

Friday, October 14, 2016

Lost (or gained?) in translation

It was interesting during last month's trip to Bulgaria to see a number of things that have changed since the last time I was there three years ago. I may (if I ever decide it's high enough on the priority list!) post some of our photos from just being around in Sofia and the other two places we were that week, but in the meantime, here's one.
Something that delighted me on our first trip to Bulgaria in March of 2013 was the recently excavated Roman ruins. As an architecture graduate with a minor concentration in ancient civilizations, it's always been a dream of mine to go to Rome and see the old Roman architectural remains. To get to do that in Bulgaria was everything I needed to satisfy that dream. They've done a really good job of preserving and displaying some of the early city remains they've been finding, and here, at a new roundabout over the river, is a fragment of the old, old, bridge supports. Lots of fun.

But almost better still is that teeny, tiny sign on the left side of the above photo.

Can't see it? Well, here it is closer up.
I love this! Although the intended meaning is pretty clear, if only from the symbols alone, I thought this was the kind of thing that my eleven-year-old would get a kick out of. What eleven year old boy do you know who isn't interested in anything related to passing grass?

Ahem.

This does have a real-life connection to our current adoption, believe it or not. With Krassimir, there was definitely a language barrier - in many ways, still is because of how completely non-verbal he remains. Although he can (as far as we know) understand much of what we say to him, it is a one-sided communication. Last night, as he was crying periodically in his bed, which is not typical for him, I went in by him repeatedly, rubbed his back, and talked to him, but I have NO idea what the matter is, and thus no idea how to do anything to help. Is he cold? Hot? Coming down with something? Did he have a bad dream? Is he remembering something bad from many years ago...or something that bummed him out this afternoon? Does his tummy hurt? Or his muscles in general? Or is he just lonely, I wonder sometimes, with no way to share what's going on inside of him. True, he's never known any different, but isn't there something inside of all of us that wants to be known and understood?

How is it going to be, though, with B? I'm confident that she will learn English quickly - she's had *some* exposure to it, and now has a greatly motivating reason to continue to apply herself to learning as much as she can over the next few months - but I'm also fully aware that she's not going to be fluent right away! I have no doubt that we'll be able to get along with the basics just fine: Are you hungry? Do you need me to help you with that? Here's the bathroom! But I'm thinking about myself as a sixteen year old girl and the complexity of emotional things going on inside, and how difficult it was sometimes to get those thoughts out with those who cared for me (Mom, friends), and we were all native English speakers! How will it be for B? How long will it be before she's able to express those emotions, and, be comfortable trying to share them with me?

And how many of those early attempts are going to come out as awkwardly as "No grass passing and stepping!" Adopting a non-verbal child from a foreign country is a much different adventure than one who is used to being understood!

Monday, October 10, 2016

Modern Technology

Thanks to the amazing internet, we will be Skyping with B tomorrow morning! We still aren't sure how often we'll get to do this during this in between time, but to get any chances at all to continue to develop a relationship with our [soon to be] oldest daughter in the months while we wait for her is pretty exciting!

We will have the help of our Bulgarian agency to translate for us - otherwise it would be a pretty basic conversation! Our kids are practicing "Drasti" ("Hello") and want to try for "How are you?" as well.

*I'm* excited to show her three fabrics I'm looking at for curtains for her bedroom to get her opinion!

Sunday, October 2, 2016

"Hi, Krassi!"

Saturdays in the fall are soccer days for our family. This year three of our kids are playing in the (very well run) city league, and we chase around to all sorts of games on many different fields every Saturday. Yesterday was an absolutely fantastic day to be out watching soccer - lovely sunny skies, temps in the 60s heading toward the 70s - just perfect.

Reuben, Gloria, and I took Owen in the small car to Owen's game. Reuben's becoming a champion spectator. He LOVES the cheering, and will cheer and "woo-hoo" with gusto whenever anyone does anything. ;)
While we were at Owen's game, Matt went with Krassi, Evania, and Leah to Rinnah's game in Big Blue. When Owen's game wrapped up, we drove to Rinnah's field, where Owen jumped out of the car to tag Leah to come jump in to the car so I could run her to her game at yet another field. When Rinnah finished, Matt drove with the rest of the crew to join us.

Upon determining that Leah did, indeed have a double-header, since it was lunch time, I went home in Big Blue with everyone except Matt, Owen, and Leah. As we were getting loaded up to go, Matt was walking toward the parking lot with Krassimir over his shoulder, just pushing his empty wheelchair. (Krassi often prefers to be down in the grass than in his chair when we're out and about like this.) Right as they were approaching the van, a car pulled up and a boy in an orange soccer jersey jumped out and starting running toward the field where his game was about to begin, but wasn't in too much of a hurry to loudly call out, "Hi, Krassi!"

I love it. I have no idea who this boy is. He's got to be either someone who was in Krassi's mainstream room for second grade last year (which he attended for 30 minutes three times a week since he spends most of his day in the special ed classroom), or this year's third grade class, with similar attendance.

One of my main goals for having Krassimir attend public school is that he will have a face in the community. I *want* for him to be able to go out now, in five years, twenty years, and see people who will recognize him and say, "Hi, Krassi!" knowing that they won't necessarily get a reply in return. I want people to see him as the person he is, and when we can be out at a soccer game, and run into a classmate who takes the moment to shout a "Hi" his way, it's great confirmation that it's working. ;)