On B? or T?

We've realized that traveling with a baby leaves a lot less time for blogging than we had on our last adoption trip! Gloria's been an amazing traveler, but she's definitely feeling the impact of everything being different, and is VERY clingy. Yes, she's a mommy's girl anyway, but here we can't put her down at all. I think she figures if she doesn't let go of one of us she's bound to get back where things are familiar!! That means, though, that every time we're back in the hotel room, our thoughts are on getting her down for a nap, or deciding which one of us gets a bit of time on the computer while the other holds her. Even now, I'm typing on one of the bed, and Daddy's trying to pull Gloria off my knee from the other side!

Walking back to our hotel (in blue on the left) after our Monday morning visit with B.

I'm torn, as my title suggests, about if I should use this bit of time to share more of our thoughts about and impressions of T, as promised at the end of the last post, or if we should shift back to our time with B, since I don't think we've shared any of that yet.

Well, B it is. As we mentioned earlier, we were able to have one visit with B on Friday morning on our way through the mountains to T's city. We were glad to get a chance to meet her and have her meet us, and give her a brief introduction to our family, and then give her a weekend to process and think about any questions she had for us before seeing us again. Although she is shy, she also has a sense of humor, and definitely (and this came out more this morning on our second visit with her) a sense of adventure! We were told, as we walked in that first morning, that she was excited to meet us, and you could see it in her face, too, as we came around the corner and saw her sitting there waiting for us.

She lives in a beautiful, newly built, group home. The country as a whole is working on moving children out of the older orphanage system of caring for children who are wards of the state toward more "family" type homes, and her home definitely reflects this. There are three buildings on the property - two larger multi-story ones (but still bright and pleasant feeling from the outside) and her single-story building. The three circle around a courtyard with a mix of pathways, greenery, and play areas. It feels welcoming, and like it would be a nice place to live.

My favorite part about our Friday morning visit was when she learned that Matt (and I) did most of the work building the addition to our home a few years ago. She laughed and said that was good, since she likes jumping on her bed, so if it needs to be fixed, it's good to know Matt's handy and will be able to take care of it! With the translator gap in between, we're still not sure if she really *does* like bouncing on her bed, or if she was just teasing - either way, it was neat to see her at ease enough to either make jokes (funny ones at that!) or make a confession like that!

She has a close friend who she's known/grown up with for as long as she can remember who was adopted and moved to the (southern) United States last December. They still stay in touch via Skype. That makes me happy, and again, shows something about the kind of care she's getting - it seems like they are very happy to help her maintain those important connections, and we assume they'll do the same when she comes home and wants to stay in touch with her current room mate.

We got to talk briefly about names when we saw her on Friday, and she likes her name and would like to keep it (and we still can't share it!) but knowing that was the direction we were going, we were able to do our *own* homework over the weekend and come back this morning with three options for middle names for her. It's kind of exciting wondering which one she is going to choose!

Gloria gave B a special treat on Friday, and a bit today, too - she let her hold her!! Any of you who know Gloria know that she's a very happy baby, but also that if Mom's in the room, she's not happy with anyone other than mom holding her. Not so with B! Gloria sat happily on B's lap for quite a while on Friday, and a little bit today, too. B is very anxious to hold her, but also a bit nervous because she hasn't held a little baby like Gloria before! It was delightful to have Gloria be so content to be on her lap!!

She has shared with us her favorite colors (blue, black, and gray), and her favorite pastime - watching TV! (anyone reading who knows us know we're not a TV watching family. But one of the interesting things about adopting an older child who is nearly on her way to being an independent adult is that we have an interesting "dance" ahead of us as we decide which things about the way we do things are not going to change, and which we will be flexible about. Thankfully our children at home are already learning that different children have different privileges and responsibilities, and that life in our house is not a one-size-fits-all deal. Because B will have her own room, it will be fairly easy to give her the option to watch some things in her bedroom. Our hope, though, is that being part of a family (and a rather interesting one at that! When people ask us what it's like having so many children, Matt and I both are quick to say that our life is never boring!) will give her other things to be part of and to be interested in, and perhaps television will decrease in importance in her life in a natural way without us having to put any boundaries on it.

This afternoon we all went out for a walk to the city center, which is just a few blocks away. The town that B lives in has a population of just under 10,000 people, so not really a "small" town, but definitely not a big city like Sofia or T's city. Matt got the job of pushing her wheelchair. Although she apparently can do some moving independently, in her words, "she's not very good at steering." Looking at her chair, I'm not terribly surprised. I'm *really* excited when she comes home to see what she could do in a chair that was fitted properly to her. The streets and sidewalks here are much more navigable than the ones in Sofia. There were a number of ups and downs over curbs, and some interesting ramps that Matt navigated backwards to avoid tipping her out of her chair ;) but overall, it wasn't too bad getting her around. We got to walk through the big hotel in the center of town (at B's request), and stopped to get slices of cake at a little patio eatery before going back. Much fun.

Gloria trying out the swings at a little play area near the city center.

Gloria is STILL not so much into solid foods - I've never had an 8 month old baby who was so happy just drinking milk! But when we got our travel dates we decided not to push it too much at home, figuring it's easier to not have to have something along for her, but since we're here, we're giving her the chance to try a few things here and there. She did pretty well with my polenta last night, and is here making faces at the creamy filling in Matt's cake. She didn't think that was too bad!

All of our visits with B are attended by a representative from Child Protection Services who has to write a report on each visit about our interactions together. Here you can see her tickling Gloria's feet. Traveling with a baby is a good idea - baby talk is a pretty universal language, and it makes for a nice connection point and ice breaker. There aren't too many people who don't like squeezing pudgy baby parts!!

There's plenty more I could say, and more I still want to share about our visits with T, but for the moment, I think this will do, because it's now solidly into the morning for all of you back in the States, and I'm guessing you wouldn't mind an update!!