The bathroom is here!

As Bobbi and I were heading down the driveway early this morning to head to Gillette for her gait analysis, what did we see at the bottom of the driveway but the bathroom!!

Granted, we still have to build it, but this is a big first step! And since the lumber company doesn't invoice until delivery, getting that delivery today on this last day of April is significant because today is our last day to use the money we have in Mira's grant fund.

Bulgarian School

[There are so many posts in draft mode here on this blog! Most of the ones with "real" content end up that way, in part a testament to the amount of available mental energy at the end of the day when it's quiet enough to write. So here's a longer one that been waiting for a few weeks, and is mostly informational, and a recapping of some things as far back as December. The pictures aren't great, but hopefully capture a bit of what we get to do!]

We were very lucky last spring to be connected with the local Bulgarian community (there are about 200 or so Bulgarian people living here in the Twin Cities) through the Bulgarian School of Minnesota - an organization that meets weekly on Sunday afternoons to help maintain Bulgarian language in culture in the families living in the area. In the beginning, it was mostly a chance for Bobbi to spend a few hours each week talking with people who spoke her language - a welcome relief for her after the hard work of living in an all-English household. She connected with a few of the women there who have all played various mentoring roles in her life since then, and their presence in our lives has been invaluable.

Last fall when the classes started up again, we enrolled Leah, Rinnah, and Evania (and their best friend who lives up the street from us). Owen could have been involved, but since he'd rather spend his free time on Sunday with the girls' friend's three older brothers, he opted out. They spend a half hour learning Bulgarian folk dances...

You can see Leah in the bright pink sweatshirt and black shorts toward the left.

...and then an hour and a half in language classes.

Evania's teacher has three and four year olds, and is an endless fountain of creativity - stories, songs, games, projects - all in simple, repetitive Bulgarian.

We've been so grateful for the chance to not only help Bobbi keep in touch with her Bulgarian language and culture, but also for our family to get to be part of it.

I missed posting about it (because I was still just barely coping with morning(?? always???) sickness and single parenting while Matt was with Mira in the hospital), but the Bulgarian school put on a Christmas program followed by an amazing potluck dinner a few weeks before Christmas. Each of the older classes contributed to the program.

Bogomila, as (obviously!) the student most proficient in the language, was asked to begin the program by reciting a poem from memory. She was awesome, and I was so proud of how confident she was.

Talking with Leah and our friend while waiting for the program to start.

The dancers did one of their folk dances (but the video I took isn't worth sharing, so I'll spare you), and then later the language class that Leah, Rinnah, and their friend are in sang a song about a white rabbit that gets lost in the woods before finding his family again. Each child had to memorize and sing a verse by him or herself.

The program ended with Дядо Коледа (Grandfather Christmas) himself making an appearance with loads of presents for each of the children. We've never done anything with Santa before with our kids, but wanted them to have a part in this part of the program, too, so had contributed one for each of our kids along with everything the other parents brought for theirs.

That part took about as long as all the rest of the program! But it was a hit for the kids. We had explained to the younger ones that someone dressed up like the Bulgarian Santa was going to be passing out presents - Evania was absolutely delighted that he gave her the little blue stuffed horse that she had asked Mom for the week before and been given "No" as an answer. "Mom said I couldn't have the hacoon [Evanese for unicorn], but the Bulgarian Santa gave it to me!" Even after I explained to her that I had picked it out for the Bulgarian Santa to give her, her delight was not diminished in the least.

We are so grateful for the way our family has been welcomed into this community - it's good for all of us!

April in MN

This has been an unseasonably snowy April.

 Bobbi's take on it all, experiencing her second spring in Minnesota?

"In Bulgaria, it is spring in April!"

Yes. It is. And usually it is in Minnesota, too, as this photo from a year ago (April 8, 2017) can attest to!

Bobbi made the most of a sunny day above freezing yesterday (though still plenty of snow after this past weekend's blizzard) by singing an oddly appropriate song over and over during her PT and OT sessions! 🎜 It's the most wonderful time of the year...🎝 (Yes - the walker she's in is too small for her. They're experimenting with a few different options that are around the therapy center in preparation for her appointment in the gait lab at the end of the month. Eventually she will be getting her own that is the right size and has all the right features.)

Approval!!!

One of the factors influencing when the bathroom project happens is funding, and just this morning, two weeks before Mira's current yearly grant amount (all four of our kids with disabilities get a varying degree of funding on a yearly basis that we can access for disability specific needs that are not covered by insurance - one of the benefits of living in one of the best states for people with disabilities, and one of the best counties within that state!) we learned that they have approved our proposal for the bathroom and have released the funds that have been pending on all four grant plans!!!

This is tremendous news! In order to make the project affordable, we're doing the work ourselves, but knowing that we can, according to what we have figured, have all of the material costs covered, is a huge deal!

And, honestly, although I'm a little apprehensive about tackling a big project knowing how busy we are already, I also know that we made it through the whole BIG addition a few years ago, so in perspective, *just* a bathroom isn't that big. ;) And, unlike the large addition project we were working on when Krassi came home and Grandma moved in, we now know that the money side of things is completely covered.

Yay! We now have two weeks to spend about one third of the projected cost of the project in order to get it reimbursed before Mira's grant year expires and any unused funds roll back.

Four times in one week...and help!

So, Bobbi's had this little spot on her right (worse) knee that just wasn't healing up quickly - at the same time I had one on my finger where I nicked it with my fabric rotary cutter one day. Tender, red, slow to heal. Mine finally got past the worst of it, and hers finally this past Sunday was looking better.

Then Monday, BAM. During her PT session, her therapist noted that there was a 3" diameter red circle around the site, and it was hot to the touch. She suggested to Dad (who had come along with Bobbi), and we agreed, that a trip to our clinic was in order. I called and got an appointment that worked, even though it wasn't at our normal office with our regular doctor. He prescribed an antibiotic, and they went on their way.

Until Tuesday. The spot was more tender, and spreading. By the evening we decided to take her to our clinic's evening urgent care and Dr. Bob agreed that the antibiotic wasn't quite cutting it, and gave her an injection of another antibiotic to give the original one a boost. Back home.

Wednesday morning - still tender, and spreading outside of the marks they had made around the spot the night before. Bobbi went to school, but when I picked her up, the nurse was looking at her leg, and was quite concerned, suggesting that a trip to the ER would not be out of line, and she said she'd come visit Bobbi that evening if they decided to admit her to the hospital for IV antibiotics. Phew! So, for the third day in a row, Bobbi and Dad packed up and headed out to see another doctor. The verdict was that, yes, the spot was not getting better, and that the original antibiotic was probably not a good match, so prescribed a different, stronger one, and sent her home. (Yay!)

Thursday we finally started seeing signs that the spread was tabling, and by today it was looking - and feeling! - a little better. I got to take her to appointment number four at yet another branch of our clinic so she could see the same doctor she'd seen Tuesday night for a visual followup, and he confirmed that, yes, he's happy with the progress, and she should be good to go from here.

But what a lot of chasing!

Also this week, we heard back from a young woman we'd gotten in touch with a while ago about potentially doing some care-giving work with Reuben and Krassimir. The grant funding they receive can be used to pay for something like this, so we've got 9 hours a week for Reuben and 6 hours a week for Krassimir budgeted, and this week she told us that of the job opportunities she'd been looking into after the family she had been working with moved north, she's decided to spend her time with our boys!!! After this week in particular, we are very excited about a little bit of extra help around here. She's going to handle the boys' therapy runs on Tuesday and Thursday mornings (meaning Matt can just stay home and get some solid work done), and then will be here three afternoons a week from the time Reuben gets off the bus until we're ready for supper. We've known for years that we'd probably end up having some regular help, and this spring and summer we're especially grateful for another set of hands!

This boy

It's about time we shared a tiny bit about what Krassimir's been up to lately. The things going on in his life aren't anything dramatic or sudden, but with the passage of time, we are seeing beautiful incremental things growing in this oldest son of ours.

Probably my favorite is the way his affectionate side has begun to blossom over the last year, and particularly the last six months. That boy, who, for so many years would resist any sort of affection from me and Matt, is not only beginning to seek it out sometimes (I think I've written in the last few months about the delight of having him crawl across the floor to where I am and pull himself across my lap), but when I sit down for no other purpose but to be with him, he just soaks it up - smiles, happy gurgly sounds of delight - he actually LIKES it!

This is such a big deal, and such a beautiful gift. I wrote a year and a half ago about the differences between the "natural" love that flows for the children I've given birth to in contrast to the sometimes "unnatural" love that I experience towards the children (child singular at that time) that we have adopted. Part of my conclusion is similar to my thoughts about food. There's nothing inherently wholesome about something just because it is "natural." There are plenty of natural things that are simply disgusting (dirty diapers!) or downright toxic (snake venom of some sort comes to mind!) Just because something is "natural" doesn't mean it's good for you!

In a similar way, many of our own natural tendencies are equally deceptive. Some things that come naturally are good; some of them are not. It is very natural to love the people who provide us with positive feedback for that investment. When that feedback isn't there, or is in fact counter-productive, the love has to come from something other than our natural instincts. Much of the loving of this boy of ours has come in an un-natural way.

I find it delightful that in a season when Matt and I have been stretched with our physical endurance, our mental patience, our emotional steadiness through many challenges that have come through the challenges that our particular version of family brings to us, God has chosen to give us the gift of smiles and laughter from this boy in response to our loving on him!! After so many months at the beginning of any affectionate gestures from me resulting in racking sobs and desperate pushing away on his part, transitioning over time to neutrality, to now know that if I sit down next to him to talk with him or rub his back that he will be delighted by it is really a precious thing.

He is Risen!

A most happy Easter to all of you!

This week not only did we all make it to church (even Bogomila who doesn't come with us on Sunday mornings, but thought that Easter was a special enough day to join us), but we were all dressed!!!

(Between the two pictures, you get at least one that is good of all of us...except Gloria who wouldn't take her hands out of her mouth...and Owen who's decided for recent family photos that the anti-tip devices on the back of Bobbi's chair make great height-boosters.)