One week home

Almost to the minute, we've been HOME for one week.

The week has gone much more smoothly than I had anticipated. Matt and I have both concluded that Reuben is still our most challenging child, and that caring for him pretty much balances out caring for the other four (Owen, Leah, Rinnah, and Krassi). In many ways Krassi has fit his way into our daily routine. He really is, as his file indicated, a very calm child, and we have already noticed that he is quite inquisitive, enjoying feeling and handling and banging the baby toys that are amply available for him. This is more than can be said for Reuben. ;) Reuben needs much more prompting to engage with play - yes, when he does, he engages at a more advanced level than Krassi does, but we are so pleased with the way that Krassi does engage at the level he's at. Seeing this makes me think that there is a lot of room for growth and development in him.

I already wrote about his little bursts of laughter on Sunday morning, and we've seen more of those throughout the week. One thing that I really enjoy is how delighted he is to be placed back in "his" spot on the living room floor. It's familiar to him, and is a place that he enjoys being. My daily life is full of little tasks that have me moving here and there throughout the house, and between my growing belly and his spasticity, it's a challenge for me to carry him along with me for any period of time. (I had wanted to use a carrier periodically, but am not sure yet how his limited flexibility will take to that, so we will likely be looking for other ways for him to get around the house more.) So in the meantime, his days are comprised of the steady banter of siblings and mom passing through every few minutes to talk or snuggle or play, and he seems quite content with his life.

Reuben seems to understand at some level that Krassi requires more gentle treatment than the others do.

Sometimes Krassi sits up on the couch for a change of scenery. Here's Leah snuggling up with a book near him.

Rinnah spends a LOT of time near Krassi. On this day she was one at a time bringing the little plastic animals down the stairs and over to Krassi. "Just a minute Krassi! I go get one more!"

One thing from his file that we have found to be not true of him here is that he "rarely smile." We get plenty of smiles out of this boy! Some of them are a response to our play and affection, and some of them just seem to burst out of him. I grabbed the camera one day when he was particularly happy. By the time I was ready, the moments had passed and he required a bit of verbal interaction from me to keep it going, but this is a sample of what he sounds like happy.

In general, as the week has gone on, we've had less of the whimpering and more happy sounds, or else just quiet. Quiet sounds so beautiful when contrasted with whimpering.

This isn't to say the week hasn't been without challenges. I mentioned with excitement that he'd had two dirty diapers one day - a relief to me after how constipated he'd been the first week. However, that trend continued, until Wednesday there was a stretch where he was going hourly. Yikes! That night we put him to bed wondering what to expect (we'd woken Wednesday morning at 4am to Reuben with such a diaper that we had to strip him in the tub, rinse off his back and belly nearly up to his armpits, scrub down the tub, and put him back in for a bath, and then two hours later Owen came in to tell us that his (and Krassi's) room stunk, and sure enough, Krassi had a big one, too) and were a little apprehensive about what this night would bring! I did a sniff test at 10pm before going to bed myself, and sure enough, the K-man was dirty. So up and changed him and put him back to bed, and he STILL work up in the morning dirty and leaking out. Yikes again! Amazingly, things slowed down over the next few days, and today he had only two dirty diapers. We like that. ;) The system's moving, but not at record speed. [sigh of relief]

I've been a little more ambitious than I had originally planned about going "out" this week. Sunday and Monday went so smoothly that I told Matt I thought I could handle taking all five children to Reuben's therapy appointments on Tuesday morning, thus freeing him to continue getting his work done. One very nice thing about the therapy center we go to is that they have been very accommodating of our family and for this fall when Reuben's schedule expanded from 2 hours to 5 hours per week spent there, arranged for us to have a small private room where we can spread out a bit and relax. The older two can get their [home]schoolwork done in a quieter setting than the lobby, and it also provides us a less stimulating place to spend time with Krassi. Knowing that we had this quiet space played a huge role in my being able to venture out. And it worked! The morning went very well. Krassi does quite well in the van, and it's always so neat to bring him back home after an outing and see how excited he is about being back here.

On Wednesday he had a short visit with our family doctor. This, too, went well. He got a little worked up about the blood pressure test, but the nurse was very perceptive and just stopped and removed the arm band before it developed into anything. So, that afternoon we decided to brave our weekly library trip. I figured it would be similar to the out and about time that we had in Bulgaria as he would spend most of his time in the stroller, and Barb (my mother-in-law) comes with us to the library, so I'd have an extra set of hands for getting small people across the parking lot. The whole outing went great until the Diaper Change. This was the beginning of the hourly dirty diapers, and I didn't want to put him back into the van with a dirty diaper. So, without thinking about it, Krassi, Rinnah and I went into the little bathroom in the kids area to change him. All was fine until shortly before we finished, Krassi began to panic. I immediately realized that there were many similarities between the small, white tiled, echo-y room that we were in and the small, hard surfaced room that diaper changes occurred in at the orphanage. Even the waist-height hard counter is similar. Poor boy stiffened up and began screaming! I put together pretty quickly what I figured was happening, and we got out of there ASAP and he eventually calmed down with me holding and singing soothingly to him (note: even the fact that I am able to soothe him that way is amazing to me! The plane ride home was pivotal for that.)

Despite that rough afternoon, the rest of the day was beautiful. I think he was VERY glad to be home.

Thursday we went again to therapy, and were very excited to get some paperwork done to start Krassi with a PT evaluation next week. Tuesday afternoon, after our morning at therapy, Reu's PT (Brian) emailed to say he had just that morning heard that Lori (the other PT who he thinks would be a great match for Krassi) had an opening on Tuesday mornings!!! They're often booked out for months, so to hear that there was room, and that Brian had asked them to place a hold on that spot for us was super exciting! I had originally planned to hold off on therapies for a while to give Krassi some solid time to bond with us, but realizing how much progress he's made in the past year made me reconsider, at least from the PT side of things. I don't want him to lose the momentum that he's got going from what they began at his orphanage with him last fall. I expressed some of my concerns to Lori, and she smiled while telling me that she can work with him for a long time from the back, letting me still be the one in his face, and also letting me learn how to handle him, how to work with him. She laughed sharing that sometimes she'll have worked  with a child for months before needing to move to the front, and at that point seems like a complete stranger to the child! ;) I can handle that - all the benefits of PT without the drawbacks of bonding confusion! I'm very much looking forward to this next Tuesday.

Friday was a beautiful weather day. We had no appointments, so decided to go for a short walk (an obsession of Reuben's) to change things up a bit. I really love having Krassi in the pictures of my kids playing out in the yard.

Okay, no Krassi in this one, but sometimes the Rinnah ones are too much fun to not share!

Krassi watching Leah...no, Krassi nearby while Leah is in the leaves. He's not particularly engaged, but not unhappy, either. He lets us know when he's unhappy.

"Must push those sleeves up!" Krassi has a 'thing' about having anything touching his arms below the elbows. Winter and mittens will be a challenge with this boy, I think. But look at how well he's keeping that hat on! On one of our colder walks in Sofia he was so distraught because of that hat that we just removed it and figured his ears would survive. They did.

Walking down the wide bike path that runs along our property and the frontage road. Little bit smoother ride than the sidewalks in Sofia! (Doesn't look as pretty, though, as the cobblestones do!)

And back up into the yard to check out Daddy's progress. With the slightly warmer weather, Matt and Chad were able to get the last of the panels onto the stair bump, and today he started putting the battens on. Not a lot of progress, but some. The inside is still looking at a LONG way to go.

Last night, too, we finally got all of the kids together for some photos on the couch. Notice they're all in their jammies because I kept forgetting at times when they had real clothes on! But, here, for your viewing pleasure, are some photos of all of our children. Well, all of the ones that are visible. Since I was taking the photo my growing belly didn't make it into the picture. ;)

Our five children, from oldest to youngest.

Little mother Leah, snuggling whoever's near her

These are funny. It looks like they're having a lively conversation, which they're obviously not, since they're both non-verbal, and don't even understand each other's language if they were verbal.

It looks like they're sharing a fantastic joke, but really what they're sharing is the contagiousness of laughter. Which, I guess is a pretty universal language that they are both rather fluent in, come to think of it!

We lost Owen and gained Daddy.

Look how strong Krassi is getting! He got himself from the position in that last picture up to the position he's in in this one!

Something more to laugh about, apparently.